Dear Beloved Dylan; I love you still, perhaps more fiercely than ever. Though I miss you every day, I want you to know that we are OK sweetheart, really OK. The jagged, vicious pain we lived with for such a long time after you chose to leave us has softened. Life is truly different now, in ways that are surprisingly … Read More
Suicide Can Be Prevented…. I’ve seen this statement in my workplace, in commercials, in the news, in magazines and online. It seems to appear with every suicide that’s of current interest. The problem with this messaging is that it infers “we have control” over suicide. If we only pay attention out there, we can prevent the suicide of someone we … Read More
As a therapist, I am honored to walk fellow suicide-loss survivors through the tragedy of losing their loved one. The range of emotions these individuals feel is so unique and yet, the similarities are what makes a support group so powerful. I recently taught to a room of survivors at a grief conference. We did a hands-on experiential type of … Read More
If I asked you to name the signs of an individual thinking about suicide, could you name them? If someone you know was contemplating suicide, would you know how to get them help? Would you know how to save their life? I recently asked a group of friends these very questions and they all stared at me with a blank … Read More
It was December of 1989 and I was eight years old. My Christmas wish list was full of toys and books and one item I wanted more than anything else…an alarm clock. I remember specifically asking my mom for “a clock that lights up in the middle of the night.” On Christmas morning, I ran downstairs and tore through all … Read More
I typically do not get too worked up over the comments people make. Most people are ignorant to the words they speak or the impact they have. Most people have not experienced the horror of a suicide and so they cannot possibly understand the pain attached to the flippant comments they make. I cannot get worked up over every insensitive … Read More
Losing my youngest brother to suicide eight years ago changed my life forever. I know things now that I could never have known if I hadn’t experienced this terrible loss. HERE’S WHAT I THINK YOU NEED TO KNOW. 1. YOU’LL NEVER KNOW WHY, AND NOTHING GOOD COMES FROM SPECULATING. One of the most frustrating things about losing a loved one to … Read More
This morning we learned that Anthony Bourdain, famous chef and TV host, has died by suicide. This comes just a couple of days after the well-known fashion designer, Kate Spade, also died by suicide. It’s tragic and devastating to say the least. The amount of media coverage that each of these suicides receives is understandable because the world feels as if … Read More
Please don’t get me wrong, I am so saddened to hear of the death of Kate Spade. It hurts my heart physically to hear the word suicide in any situation. However, I am so conditioned to look for it when certain groups of people die. Were they young? Did they have an illness? Was an accident reported in the area … Read More
Dear Why, You have traveled this journey with me as an ever-present companion. We have traversed through this terrain, so unfamiliar and unsteady. But like a Dear John letter, I write to say that we have reached the fork in the road. I want to travel on without you. The hardest and simplest truth is this: For my father, living hurt too … Read More